20 Negotiating Tips from Chris Voss’ “Never Split the Difference”
Chris Voss’ "Never Split the Difference" has been a game changer in helping me improve my negotiation tactics. Chris was a lead hostage negotiator at the FBI. In "Never Split the Difference," he takes us through a master course in negotiating, showing us how to utilize unconventional negotiation tactics based on human psychology, tactics that have been proven by real-world experience. It's become a go-to resource for anyone looking to improve their negotiation skills, and a must read for any executive or founder (or anyone looking to improve their communication skills). In this post, I’ve distilled the book into 20 tips, with specific examples.
Use Tactical Empathy
Example 1: "It sounds like this is really challenging for you."
Example 2: "You seem really passionate about this project."
Why: Demonstrates understanding and validation, helping to build trust and lower defenses.
Practice Active Listening
Example 1: "So, what you're saying is that you need more flexibility in the contract, correct?"
Example 2: "If I understand correctly, your main concern is our delivery timeline?"
Why: Shows you are attentive and care about their concerns, which encourages openness.
Master Mirroring
Example 1: They say, "I need this done by tomorrow." You respond, "By tomorrow?"
Example 2: "We can't go over budget." You mirror, "Can't go over budget?"
Why: Encourages the other party to expand on their thoughts or feelings, providing you more information.
Embrace Silence
Example 1: After making an offer, pause and wait for them to fill the silence.
Example 2: Remain silent after they express a concern to encourage them to elaborate.
Why: Silence can lead the other party to reveal more than they intended or agree to terms to break the tension.
Label Emotions
Example 1: "You seem quite concerned about meeting this deadline."
Example 2: "It looks like this issue is really important to you."
Why: Helps diffuse emotions by making them feel understood, potentially making the negotiation smoother.
Get to 'No'
Example 1: "Is now a bad time to discuss the project details?"
Example 2: "Would it be out of the question to consider extending the deadline?"
Why: People feel more secure and in control when they can say no, opening them up to more honest discussions afterward.
Get to 'That’s Right'
Example 1: "So, you need a solution that’s both cost-effective and scalable, is that right?"
Example 2: "You're looking for a partner who understands your long-term goals, is that right?"
Why: Hearing "that's right" from the counterpart confirms they believe you understand their point of view, building rapport.
Beware of 'Yes'
Example 1: "You said yes to the timeline, but can we go over what specific steps you'll take to meet it?"
Example 2: "I appreciate your agreement; how do we start implementing this?"
Why: Ensures the agreement is genuine and not just a placating response.
Calibrated Questions
Example 1: "How can we ensure we're meeting your expectations without exceeding the budget?"
Example 2: "What needs to happen for us to finalize the deal today?"
Why: Shifts the cognitive load to them, making them part of finding the solution and increasing buy-in.
Acknowledge the Other Side
Example 1: "I see your point about wanting earlier delivery times."
Example 2: "You've raised a valid concern about the costs involved."
Why: Acknowledging their views reduces tension and can make them more receptive to your ideas.
Prepare an Accusation Audit
Example 1: "You might think we're not experienced enough, but here's what we've done in similar situations..."
Example 2: "I understand you may be thinking this is too expensive, so let’s look at what you’re getting for the investment."
Why: Preemptively addressing potential objections can eliminate them before they become a barrier.
Use Odd Numbers
Example 1: "I can offer you 17% off the list price."
Example 2: "How about we meet again in 5 weeks to reassess our progress?"
Why: Odd numbers seem more calculated and less rounded, suggesting that they are carefully considered and thus harder to negotiate.
Anchor Their Emotions
Example 1: "I’m glad we agree on the importance of this project's success."
Example 2: "It's great to see your enthusiasm for moving forward with this plan."
Why: Starts the negotiation on a positive emotional note, which can influence the course of the conversation.
Establish a Range
Example 1: "I believe a fair price would be between $1,200 and $1,400."
Example 2: "We're looking to close this deal at somewhere between $50,000 and $55,000."
Why: Sets the stage for negotiation within a range, with your target price ideally set near the lower end of what they find acceptable.
Set Up a Two-Choice Illusion
Example 1: "Would you prefer we handle the implementation in two stages over six months, or is a more intensive three-month completion with more frequent updates more suitable for you?"
Example 2: "For the project start, would next month or the following month work better for you?"
Why: Provides a sense of control while steering the decision within acceptable parameters for you.
Use Non-Monetary Terms to Your Advantage
Example 1: "If price is a sticking point, could we discuss longer payment terms?"
Example 2: "Perhaps we can include additional support services instead of lowering the cost further."
Why: Expands the negotiation beyond price to include other factors that might be easier to adjust.
Look for Black Swans
Example 1: "Can you explain more about why this timeline is critical for you?"
Example 2: "What are the consequences if we don't meet the current specifications?"
Why: Encourages revelation of information that could dramatically shift the negotiation dynamics.
Bend Reality
Example 1: "Compared to the standard 20% industry rate, our 15% fee is a considerable saving."
Example 2: "While our upfront cost is higher, the long-term savings significantly outweigh initial expenses."
Why: By framing your offer against a harsher norm, it appears more attractive.
Confirm the Agreement
Example 1: "Just to confirm, you'll deliver part A by June, and we agreed on the cost of $5000, correct?"
Example 2: "So we're agreed: the terms are $10,000 for the complete package, to be finalized by the end of this quarter?"
Why: Ensures both parties are clear on the agreement's details, reducing the chance of misunderstandings later.
Always Be Ready to Walk Away
Example 1: "While we value this partnership, we must meet our minimum requirement of $10,000 for the contract to proceed."
Example 2: "We need to ensure that the terms meet our core business needs, or we'll need to reconsider our options."
Why: Shows you are not desperate and that you have clear boundaries, which can increase your leverage.
These tips just scratch the surface of what’s in Chris Voss’ book. I’d encourage you to read the book yourself to get a better understanding of the pioneering work that Chris did in the field. Using these tactics, I recently helped a client reduce their contract size by $30k.
